The funniest thing I've seen today

[Bloodlessr]

:lol:

 

[Donutos]

"vin diesel was the inspiration for captain planet"

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

[dascoot]

:lol: "Vin Diesel coined the phrase 'Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker!' When Bruce Willis stole it from him, Vin Diesel killed him with a poison-arrow frog. This is the prologue to The Sixth Sense."

Oh damn, whoever came up with all these is pure genius.

 

[Bloodlessr]

Pretty much genius.

 

[dascoot]

"Once, when Vin was REALLY hungry, he punched himself back in time just to eat a dinosaur."

 

[ledzepgrl]

"When Vin Diesel falls in water, he doesn't get wet, the water gets Vin." :lol:

 

[dascoot]

Haha that reminds me of "Particle Man".

 

[ledzepgrl]

Not FUNNY, per se, but fun little game with cards

 

[Donutos]

hey that's fun, surprised me when it changed the direction of my flips

 

[ledzepgrl]

Yeah, isn't that an addictive game? I'm a retard, I didn't even realize at first that you could pan to the left and right to make it go in, ha ha

 

[dascoot]

Hehe yeah me neither.. that's cool, it reminds me of that game with the paperball and the fan and the trashcan.

 

[dascoot]

Hahah I think this is my favorite Vin Diesel fact: "When Vin Diesel was born, the nurse said, 'Holy crap! That's Vin Diesel!' Then she had had sex with him. At that point, she was the third girl he had slept with." :lol:

 

[Donutos]

:lol: :lol:

 

[Donutos]

damnit now i'm hooked on this thing again

"Vin Diesel once had an adventure with three gay ducks and a time machine. This is now referred to as Kwanzaa."

"vin Diesel always does math homework in pen"

 

[dascoot]

"Vin Diesel once walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors."

 

[Donutos]

"Vin Diesel was the real creator of Spawn, not Todd McFarlane. In fact, Vin Diesel IS Spawn, and using his awesome hell powers, he thought up the greatest sci-fi movies ever, including Alien, Blade Runner, and Terminator. He also starred in all of them, as both the main characters and as the monsters, and his favorite roles were those of Newt, the Alien Queen, Pris, and John Connor, while simultaneously impregnating all the supposed people who played the above-mentioned roles, and causing all of them to give birth to their own grandchildren, because his semen is really Red Bull energy drink."

 

[dascoot]

"Crop circles are Vin's way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the fuck down."

"There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Vin Diesel allows to live."

"Vin Diesel has two speeds: walk and kill."

"Vin Diesel is not lactose intolerant, he just refuses to put up with lactose's shit."

"Vin Diesel once beat Super Mario Bros 3 without even touching his Nintendo controller. He just yelled at his TV in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich, and the game beat itself out of fear."

"Vin Diesel doesn't believe in rubber condoms. Instead, he sticks his penis in a girl, and uses that girl as a condom while fucking another."

:lol: :lol: :lol: These are on the top 30.. oh lord.. my face hurts from laughing.. :lol:

 

[Donutos]

i can't breath :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

[dascoot]

I just choked on my own spit. :blink: :lol: :lol: :lol:

"Vin Diesel was the hunter who shot Bambi's Mother. He then wore her carcass like it was a coat while he made his rounds at the local children's hospital."

"If you were to lock Vin Diesel in a room with a guitar, a year later you would have the greatest album ever, it would sweep the Grammy's. When asked why he doesn't do this Vin replied "Because Grammy's are for queers." Then he ate a knife to show the seriousness of his response."

"It takes 14 puppeteers to make Vin Diesel smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage."

 

[Donutos]

"Shortly after the Big Bang had occurred, Diesel sought out Ingvar Kamprad (the mastermind behind IKEA) and forged the great demons primitive models. Kamprad was infuriated and swore to fashion a model so fiendish in design that not even Vin himself would be able to assemble it. Shortly thereafter a cardboard box was delivered to Diesel's residence (which lay buried deep inside the sun itself). Smiling to himself, Diesel accepted the challenge, but was shocked to find that the model consisted only of a mountain of ore, an enormous quantity of wood, and a small plastic flap. A small note on the box let our protagonist know that the instructions came written in Braille, and were to be found on the inside of Gods bladder. Our hero went to work, and six days later he was finished. He stared in awe, as he realized that he had actually created the Pangaea. Blinded by anger, Kamprad attacked Diesel. The two demigods fought for an eternity. Finally, Diesel emerged victorious after ripping Greenland out of the Pangaea and hurling it at Kamprad. After this he made love to himself, spawning several overlords, and in the long run, created life as we know it."

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: